JennaSayQuoi
Funny Cybersex Chat (8)
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VictimX_27:
HEY!
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cheesedog:
Hello there
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VictimX_27:
I'm back
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cheesedog:
Have fun at the mall?
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VictimX_27:
Yeah. I got some new shoes
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cheesedog:
Interesting
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VictimX_27:
Not really. Just shoes
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cheesedog:
You ready to be sexed up now?
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VictimX_27:
LOL
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cheesedog:
Is that a yes?
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VictimX_27:
Could be
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VictimX_27:
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cheesedog:
HOT DAMN!
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cheesedog:
I gently suck your nipples
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cheesedog:
I feel them get hard then I jam my hand down your..
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VictimX_27:
WOAH! Slow down cowboy
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cheesedog:
Why?
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VictimX_27:
I'm not just gonna cyber with you if thats all you want
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cheesedog:
What do you mean?
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VictimX_27:
You're not going to ignore me later are you?
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cheesedog:
Of course not.
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cheesedog:
I like you.
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VictimX_27:
I don't even know how old you are.
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cheesedog:
I'm 27. Now....
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cheesedog:
I gently massage your breasts with my rough hands
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cheesedog:
I roll your nipples between my fingers
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VictimX_27:
WAIT!
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cheesedog:
They get hard again... what?
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VictimX_27:
Don't you wanna know anything about me first?
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VictimX_27:
Like what I like?
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cheesedog:
Oh yeah. Sure. Hurry up.
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VictimX_27:
That didn't sound convincing.
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cheesedog:
YES I WANNA KNOW WHAT YOU LIKE RIGHT NOW!!!
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VictimX_27:
Now u r being a smartass
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VictimX_27:
Just give me a minute
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cheesedog:
ok
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VictimX_27:
I'm back
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cheesedog:
np
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VictimX_27:
thank you
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cheesedog:
So what do you like?
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VictimX_27:
Ummmm being licked
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cheesedog:
Where?
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VictimX_27:
Everywhere
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cheesedog:
Any place in particular?
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VictimX_27:
uhhh yeah
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cheesedog:
tell me
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VictimX_27:
on my clit
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cheesedog:
OK!
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cheesedog:
NOW YOU'RE TALKIN!
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VictimX_27:
I also like being done from behind
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cheesedog:
Ooooooohhhh.
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cheesedog:
Ok. Check this out.
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cheesedog:
We're in an abandoned building.
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cheesedog:
No is around. Its all quiet.
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VictimX_27:
Uh huh
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cheesedog:
I gently unbutton your pants and slide my hand across your clit
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cheesedog:
You get all warm and juicy.
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cheesedog:
I slip your panties down and continue to massage your pussy
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VictimX_27:
oooohh mmmm
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cheesedog:
I place my mouth on your pussy as I eat you from behind
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cheesedog:
I wiggle my tounge around across your moist hole
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VictimX_27:
yessss
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cheesedog:
I cover your ears with my hands as I eat you.
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cheesedog:
Egon and Ray sneak in from the back.
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cheesedog:
*Powering up Proton packs*
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VictimX_27:
???
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cheesedog:
Then... Egon BLASTS your pasty white ass!!
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cheesedog:
POW!! BZZZZZTTTTTPHTTTTTT!!!
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cheesedog:
Winston and Peter set up the containment trap....
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VictimX_27:
WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT!!!
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cheesedog:
You wiggle around in the proton streams buck naked
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cheesedog:
The streams almost cross! Look out!!
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cheesedog:
Peter smacks you across the chin with his gun
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cheesedog:
They open the trap and it sucks your pale ass in!
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VictimX_27:
This isn't funny johnny!
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cheesedog:
SHUT UP! YOUR CAUGHT!
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cheesedog:
**puts you in the containment area**
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cheesedog:
Slimer is in there too..
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VictimX_27:
YOU ARE A FUCKING ASSHOLE!
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cheesedog:
I SAID SHUT THE FUCK UP!
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cheesedog:
Now...Slimer sticks his green, slimey cock in your pigmentless ass.
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cheesedog:
**HE SLIMES YOU!**
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VictimX_27:
Never talk to me again!
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cheesedog:
He cums all over your hair... but no one notices cause its the same color
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VictimX_27:
FUCK YOUUUU
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cheesedog:
He eats a powdered donut!
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VictimX_27:
SHUT UP AND FUCK YOUUUU!!!!!
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cheesedog:
o wait! It was your hand, you scary, white whore!
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VictimX_27:
LEAVE ME ALONE!!!
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cheesedog:
Chill out, Casper. You're trapped, I said.
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cheesedog:
Slimer goes to lick your clit.
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cheesedog:
But there is already slime on your it!!
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cheesedog:
Slimer thinks you are a cheater and gets jealous!!
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cheesedog:
HE RIPS YOUR WHITE TITS OFF!
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VictimX_27:
FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!
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cheesedog:
**Plays volleyball with them**
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VictimX_27:
->USER HAS LOGGED OUT<-
Funny Cybersex Chat (7)
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Partner6:
So you're really a 18 yr old girl right?
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J-Dogg:
Yeah, J for Julie.
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Partner6:
So whats with the "Dogg"
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J-Dogg:
Uh, It's cause I'm into the latina gangs and shit. You know, rollin with tha homies and shit.
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Partner6:
Oh, uh ok thats cool. So you ever seen a gun?
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J-Dogg:
Yeah like I got 6 guns.
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Partner6:
Thats cool, so you wanna see my gun?
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J-Dogg:
hehe, of course baby.
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Partner6:
I pull off my pants and show you my "gun".
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J-Dogg:
Ohh, it's so big.
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Partner6:
Yeah, what you want to do?
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J-Dogg:
Umm, i guess stroke it or something.
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Partner6:
It likes that.
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J-Dogg:
aight.
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Partner6:
Keep talking to me baby...
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J-Dogg:
I kiss you on the mouth, hard, but then gently.
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Partner6:
Mmmm, daddy like.
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J-Dogg:
I unzip my pants...
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Partner6:
Yes, show me what you got.
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J-Dogg:
I pull out my schlong, and rub it on your breasts...
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Partner6:
WTF?!
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J-Dogg:
Oh shit, I meant, your schlong! your schlong!
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Partner6:
I've had it with you queers trying to cyber me, I only fuck women...
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J-Dogg:
Shit just don't shoot me man, I wasn't serious about the guns I have, I'm unarmed!
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Partner6:
You dipshit.
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J-Dogg:
I whimper to myself...
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J-Dogg:
please don't shoot me Mr.
Funny Cybersex Chat (7)
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bloodninja:
Wanna cyber?
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Katie_007:
Sure, you into vegetables?
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bloodninja:
What like gardening an shit?
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Katie_007:
Yeah, something like that.
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bloodninja:
Nothing turns me on more, check this out:
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bloodninja:
You bend over to harvest your radishes.
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(pause)
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Katie_007:
is that it?
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bloodninja:
You water your tomato patch.
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bloodninja:
Are you ready for my fresh produce?
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Katie_007:
I was thinking of like, sexual acts INVOLVING vegetables... Can you make it a little more sexy for me?
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(pause)
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bloodninja:
I touch you on your lettuce, you massage my spinach... sexily.
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bloodninja:
I ride your buttocks like they were Amber Waves of grains.
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Katie_007:
Grain doesn't really turn me on... I was thinking more along the lines of carrots and zucchinis.
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bloodninja:
my zucchinis carresses your carrots.
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bloodninja:
Damn baby you're right, this shit is HOTT.
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Katie_007:
...
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bloodninja:
My turnips listen for the soft cry of your love. My insides turn to celery as I unleash my warm and sticky cauliflower of love.
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Katie_007:
What the fuck is this madlibs? I'm outta here.
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bloodninja:
Yeah, well I already unleashed my cauliflower, all over your olives, and up in your eyes. Now you can't see. Bitch.
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Katie_007:
whatever.
Funny Cybersex Chat (6)
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Wellhung:
Hello, Sweetheart. What do you look like?
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Sweetheart:
I am wearing a red silk blouse, a miniskirt and high heels. I work out every day, I'm toned and perfect. My measurements are 36-24-36. What do you look like?
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Wellhung:
I'm 6'3" and about 250 pounds.I wear glasses and I have on a pair of blue sweat pants I just bought from Walmart.I'm also wearing a T-shirt with a few spots of barbecue sauce on it from dinner...it smells funny.
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Sweetheart:
I want you.Would you like to screw me?
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Wellhung:
OK
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Sweetheart:
We're in my bedroom.There's soft music playing on the stereo and candles on my dresser and night table.I'm looking up into your eyes, smiling. My hand works its way down to your crotch and begins to fondle your huge, swelling bulge.
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Wellhung:
I'm gulping, I'm beginning to sweat.
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Sweetheart:
I'm pulling up your shirt and kissing your chest.
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Wellhung:
Now I'm unbuttoning your blouse.My hands are trembling.
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Sweetheart:
I'm moaning softly.
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Wellhung:
I'm taking hold of your blouse and sliding it off slowly.
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Sweetheart:
I'm throwing my head back in pleasure.The cool silk slides off my warm skin.I'm rubbing your bulge faster, pulling and rubbing.
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Wellhung:
My hand suddenly jerks spastically and accidentally rips a hole in your blouse.I'm sorry.
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Sweetheart:
That's OK, it wasn't really too expensive.
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Wellhung:
I'll pay for it.
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Sweetheart:
Don't worry about it.I'm wearing a lacy black bra.My soft breasts are rising and falling, as I breath harder and harder.
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Wellhung:
I'm fumbling with the clasp on your bra.I think it's stuck. Do you have any scissors?
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Sweetheart:
I take your hand and kiss it softly.I'm reaching back undoing the clasp. The bra slides off my body. The air caresses my breasts. My nipples are erect for you.
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Wellhung:
How did you do that? I'm picking up the bra and inspecting the clasp.
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Sweetheart:
I'm arching my back. Oh baby. I just want to feel your tongue all over me.
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Wellhung:
I'm dropping the bra. Now I'm licking your, you know, breasts. They're neat!
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Sweetheart:
I'm running my fingers through your hair. Now I'm nibbling your ear.
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Wellhung:
I suddenly sneeze. Your breasts are covered with spit and phlegm.
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Sweetheart:
What?
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Wellhung:
I'm so sorry. Really.
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Sweetheart:
I'm wiping your phlegm off my breasts with the remains of my blouse.
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Wellhung:
I'm taking the sopping wet blouse from you. I drop it with a plop.
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Sweetheart:
OK. I'm pulling your sweat pants down and rubbing your hard tool.
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Wellhung:
I'm screaming like a woman. Your hands are cold! Yeeee!
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Sweetheart:
I'm pulling up my miniskirt. Take off my panties.
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Wellhung:
I'm pulling off your panties. My tongue is going all over, in and out nibbling on you...umm... wait a minute.
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Sweetheart:
What's the matter?
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Wellhung:
I've got a pubic hair caught in my throat. I'm choking.
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Sweetheart:
Are you OK?
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Wellhung:
I'm having a coughing fit. I'm turning all red.
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Sweetheart:
Can I help?
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Wellhung:
I'm running to the kitchen, choking wildly. I'm fumbling through the cabinets, looking for a cup. Where do you keep your cups?
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Sweetheart:
In the cabinet to the right of the sink.
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Wellhung:
I'm drinking a cup of water. There, that's better.
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Sweetheart:
Come back to me, lover.
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Wellhung:
I'm washing the cup now.
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Sweetheart:
I'm on the bed arching for you.
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Wellhung:
I'm drying the cup. Now I'm putting it back in the cabinet. And now I'm walking back to the bedroom. Wait, it's dark, I'm lost. Where's the bedroom?
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Sweetheart:
Last door on the left at the end of the hall.
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Wellhung:
I found it.
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Sweetheart:
I'm tuggin' off your pants. I'm moaning. I want you so badly.
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Wellhung:
Me too.
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Sweetheart:
Your pants are off. I kiss you passionately-our naked bodies pressing each other.
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Wellhung:
Your face is pushing my glasses into my face. It hurts.
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Sweetheart Why don't you take off your glasses?
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Wellhung:
OK, but I can't see very well without them. I place the glasses on the night table.
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Sweetheart:
I'm bending over the bed. Give it to me, baby!
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Wellhung:
I have to pee. I'm fumbling my way blindly across the room and toward the bathroom.
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Sweetheart:
Hurry back, lover.
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Wellhung:
I find the bathroom and it's dark. I'm feeling around for the toilet. I lift the lid.
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Sweetheart:
I'm waiting eagerly for your return.
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Wellhung:
I'm done going. I'm feeling around for the flush handle, but I can't find it. Uh-oh!
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Sweetheart:
What's the matter now?
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Wellhung:
I've realized that I've peed into your laundry hamper. Sorry again. I'm walking back to the bedroom now, blindly feeling my way.
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Sweetheart:
Mmm, yes. Come on.
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Wellhung:
OK, now I'm going to put my...you know ...thing...in your...you know...woman's thing.
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Sweetheart:
Yes! Do it, baby! Do it!
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Wellhung:
I'm touching your smooth butt. It feels so nice. I kiss your neck. Umm, I'm having a little trouble here.
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Sweetheart:
I'm moving my ass back and forth, moaning. I can't stand it another second! Slide in! Screw me now!
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Wellhung:
I'm flaccid.
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Sweetheart:
What?
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Wellhung:
I'm limp. I can't sustain an erection.
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Sweetheart:
I'm standing up and turning around; an incredulous look on my face.
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Wellhung:
I'm shrugging with a sad look on my face, my weiner all floppy. I'm going to get my glasses and see what's wrong.
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Sweetheart:
No, never mind. I'm getting dressed. I'm putting on my underwear. Now I'm putting on my wet nasty blouse.
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Wellhung:
No wait! Now I'm squinting, trying to find the night table. I'm feeling along the dresser, knocking over cans of hair spray, picture frames and your candles.
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Sweetheart:
I'm buttoning my blouse. Now I'm putting on my shoes.
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Wellhung:
I've found my glasses. I'm putting them on. My God! One of our candles fell on the curtain. The curtain is on fire! I'm pointing at it, a shocked look on my face.
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Sweetheart:
Go to hell. I'm logging off, you loser!
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Wellhung:
Now the carpet is on fire! Oh noooo!
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